Tribulations + anguish = maximum depression!!

Phisically, I maybe seemed to be alright… but seriously I’m not!!! Please… I’m so tired… I had enough of all this. I am trying and learning to face the facts… but please don’t keep on mentioning about it. Don’t keep on questioning about it. Please…please… don’t talk about it anymore…. Why I entered this course at the very beginning even though I know this would happen? Is teaching the right profession for me? Why I chose teaching? Do I have of what it takes to be a teacher? Why SABAH? Why LAHAD DATU?............. Only one word answers all…. “Entaaahhlaaaa…..”

Melawan pula dengan perasaan….(kecil hati dengan sikap seseorang) dan keserabutan kepala otakku yang dah taktau nak lari kemana lagi dah. I’m not strong enough to face all this alone… Tapi syukur, didalam keserabutan dan keresahan yang Allah sahaja yang tahu… aku dapat buat mende lain yang dapat melupakan sekejap masalah2 tadi. Hmm.. Kak Saida nampaknye berminat nak tempah cupcakes dari Kak Ngah.. dan aku pun jadilah orang tengah. 4 set semuanya…. Barbie doll cake and fairy tales cuppies for Citah… football cuppies for Anas… and fairytales cuppies for Damia.

So, last Saturday, berpeluanglah merayau hingga ke Damansara to take all the cuppies including Kak Nurul punya order sekali. Fuh… the purple Hyundai Getz was fulled with cuppies!!! Hehehe… Before reaching Kak Saida’s house, drop by at Giant, meeting point untuk cuppies Kak Nurul. Thanks kak atas duit belanja tu? Hehehehe…. Then, heading to Kak Saida’s house plak. Alamak, ingat-ingat lupa plak jalan kesana… kene tahan dengan security guard plak tu. Iskh..iskh.. Tapi tugasan berjaya dilunaskan…. All the cuppies especially the Barbie doll cake were arrived safely. Thanks Kak Ida…(kak Ida pun bagi duit belanja juga…hehehe) Hope semua pun enjoy!Ibu Citah dengan kek Barbie Doll.... fuh.. mencabar tau nak bawak kek tu dari Damansara ke Cheras. Citah berkata didalam hati.... "Itu Citah punya tau Ibu..." hehehe...

Citah dah tak sabar nak terkam all the cute cuppies tu... hehehe... Comel jek Citah ni... Sorry Citah... teacher terpanggil Citah.. Damia pulak... hehehe... Confius...

Khalid dok perhati jek football cuppies Abang dia, Anas... hehehe... Tu lah Anas... dah 10 tahun dah dia. Dulu masa first time jumpa umur 3 tahun. Tapi terharu... ingat lagi kat teacher dia ni... hehehe...

Hmm.. dah kene start packing barang ni… rasa macam nak bawak printer skali. Hmmm… should or should not?? Dilemma…. Saper bleh tolong saya amik jubah konvo 4 August nanti?? Huhuhu… Ibu takleh cuti.. Ayah outstation time tu… Angah ada kelas… Aduhai….
Entah kenapa sekarang ni hati menjadi sangat rapuh dan amat mudah tersentuh…Especially, When listening to these two songs…. You Are Not Alone and Will You Be There For Me by MJ…and the tears drop again….

“In my darkest hour.. in my deepest despair…Will you still there? Will you be there? In my frust and my tribulations…. Through my doubts and frustrations… In my anguish and my pain…. In my joy and my sorrow…And the promise of another tomorrow…. I’ll never let you apart… for always you in my heart…”